I'm no theologian, but I'm pretty sure that, contrary to the assertions of Virginia Legislator Bob Marshall, God doesn't hate disabled people. I mean, unless I misread the Beatitudes – the blessings upon the poor and the weak and those who show mercy that Jesus proclaimed in his Sermon on the Mount – which I had kinda understood to mean, at least in part, that mean-spirited asshats who sneer at crippled children just don't get into the Kingdom of Heaven.
But maybe I was wrong. Maybe Jesus was actually being sarcastic. Maybe he really meant that the poor and the meek and the merciful shouldn't inherit anything, because that shit is weak, and also an abomination, and probably also God's punishment for the sins of the mothers (fornicators! aborters! BAD WOMEN!) Because, you know, that sounds more like Jesus. I'm going to be sure to go tell my sister that, because her disabled and terminally ill son, my nephew, just isn't going to get into Heaven – Bob Marshall said so – and that's totally her fault.
So we should be grateful to Bob Marshall for clearing up any exegetical confusion caused by the Gospel of Matthew, and ensuring that we can all get on with the holy work of hating on anyone who is not perfect in Bob Marshall's eyes and secure our places in Heaven, amen. And then we can go celebrate by kicking some puppies and kittens and shooting baby ducks and roasting one of those wee fuzzy lambs that Jesus like to keep around, you know, for eating.
Somewhere, Satan is laughing. Thanks Bob Marshall.