Bad Moms Stand. In Tutus.

By on February 28, 2011

Last week, Aiming Low published a post that I’d written about my nephew Tanner (an edited version of this post), as part of their month-long campaign to raise awareness of disabilities. Which was awesome, because I want to do everything that I can to support that cause myself. But, inevitably, the trolls came out, one leaving a comment on that post, and a handful of others sending me anonymous emails, asserting that I wasn’t standing up for Tanner but standing up for myself. Trying to get attention for myself. Because, you know, that’s the best way to get it. That’s why everyone does it, right?

There’s a reason that I so often close comments on post about Tanner, and that’s it. Because some people see anyone raising their voice on someone else’s behalf or in support of a cause as a plea for personal attention and can’t resist spewing their assertions to that effect. (Projection much?)

But here’s the reason that I keep on writing about Tanner, that I keep standing up for him and raising my voice on his behalf, even as some people boo and hiss: because he can’t stand up for himself. Literally, and figuratively. Nor can so many children, so many people. And if we let ourselves – if I let myself – be silenced by the soul-damaged few who can’t contain whatever inner hurt compels them to frame any good as corrupt, then it’s those children, those people, the Tanners of the world who lose. Who don’t get their stories told. Who don’t get their causes championed. So, no. I’ll keep standing up.

And in a couple of weeks, I’m going to stand up literally. In a tutu. On ice.

You heard me.

Disney’s Toy Story On Ice is coming to Toronto during March break, and a portion of the proceeds from all regular tickets sold will be donated to Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy in Tanner’s name. And? I’ll be introducing the opening show on March 15th. In a tutu, of course.

So you know what would be awesome? If a bunch of you locals could come out and show your support and help us raise money and awareness and basically just work our Fairy God-Dork power! And if some of you wore tutus? ALL THE BETTER. Just remember to use the code TANNER when you purchase your tickets – you can get them HERE – and then fluff out your tutus and get ready to SMILE. (Or, leave the tutu at home and just come out quietly to enjoy me making a fairytastic fool of myself. Or just come to one of the other shows and forget all about me. As long as you come enjoy the show, and use the code so that we can help PPMD work toward a future in which little boys like Tanner don’t face a death sentence.)

And if you’re not local? Just stand up for somebody. It doesn’t have to be a child with DMD, or someone with a disability, and it doesn’t have to be in a tutu (although tutus are awesome). Just, stand up. Raise your voice on someone else’s behalf. Champion a cause. Stick up your middle finger at anyone who would boo and hiss and remind yourself that any such person is small and damaged of soul and cut off from the tremendous love that those of us who do stand share in. Just do that.


(Steal this badge! Post it everywhere! Tell all your friends! Wear tutus!)

About Her Bad Mother

Bad is the new good.


  1. Stories Hard To Tell - Her Bad Mother says:

    [...] there’s this, which is is happier. You could join me to stand for Tanner and all boys with Duchennes and, for that matter, all the [...]

  2. News Round-Up March 10: The Social Family, at Bunchland says:

    [...] If any of you are planning to attend Disney On Ice Toy Story 3, use the code TANNER when ordering tickets to ensure a portion of the sales go to Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy. Via Her Bad [...]

  3. The Sins Of The Tiger-Blooded Assassin Warlock Fathers - Her Bad Mother says:

    [...] in Toronto and area and are looking for something to do with the family this week, consider coming to see Disney On Ice’s Toy Story 3. If you use the code TANNER to purchase your ticket, a portion of proceeds will go to Parent [...]

  4. Stand In The Place Where You Drop Your Chocolate Nibs - Her Bad Mother says:

    [...] – which is, let it be known, a stadium – with a spotlight on me, and a microphone. And a tutu, of course. And a toddler, who couldn’t understand why Mommy got to stand right at the ice in the [...]